Reality Check: Thoughts on Dying, Living and the stuff in the middle

I discovered today that J. D. Salinger passed away. Very sad. Not that we were buddies or close or even knew one another. But when an artist or author or public figure dies, it’s hard for us not to feel some attachment.

We associate with the works of people. Be it a building (think: Frank Lloyd Wright) or a car (Henry Ford) or a painting (Norman Rockwell) or a song (Michael Jackson). Or in this case, a book. We transfer our own life into that thing, whatever it is, and because we become a part of it, we feel close, even connected in some way, to its creator.

Catcher In the Rye was one of those timeless works (and actually one of my own favorites) that spoke personally to generations of people, young and old. Of course, Lee Harvey Oswald owning a copy and the ensuing assassination of President John F. Kennedy, did no harm to the book’s popularity.

But we identified with Salinger, maybe only in some tiny part. And we wonder what makes his work so influential, so powerful, so compelling. We think on him. We read him. We feel like we must have similarities. And we mourn him now. It’s a poignant loss, even though he was in his nineties.

I remember very well when my mother passed away. Not too very long ago. Funny how certain memories can be crystal clear, but at the same time, almost foggy. We were “expecting” her passing at some point, but nothing really prepares you fully for that.

I remember standing alone in the funeral parlor, looking at my mother lying there in her casket, and thinking about all the things I didn’t say. All the presents I forgot to give. All the visits I put off til later. All the conversations I should’ve lingered in. All the hugs I thought were trivial.

There’s nothing like death to make you think about life. There’s nothing like the sudden void that death leaves, to remind the living of how trivial this life can be at times.

But in her death, I also found a new focus. A new outlook. A different point of view and a fresh beginning. In some way, her death was part of God’s gift of continuing life. Even though we mourn the loss of someone, in their passing, God reminds us of our own mortality.

He shows us our past and reminds us of our once-optimistic gaze into our future. We feel a new start. A new foothold on things. And we tuck our old thoughts and memories and associations away into our pockets, dry our eyes and take a deep breath, and look out to the horizon, thinking about how much better things are going to be.

Today’s Scripture: Psalm 27:4 - One thing I ask of the LORD, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to seek him in his temple.

Today’s Prayer: Father, as I go through this day and as I think on the subjects of death and loss, please help me to remember the greatest gift I have is the life that You’ve given me. And please help me to seek You and Your beauty, everyday.

Last Thoughts:

When someone dies, we don’t have to die (emotionally or spiritually) with them. Remember that life is beautiful and we’re blessed to live it.

When Christ died, his followers were in shambles. But through His death, they soon found encouragement and strength to do amazing things. Look ahead!

When celebrities die, we mourn them as if they were close friends. THINK ABOUT IT: Who (celebrity or public figure) do you identify with most closely? Why? And could you seek out better influences?

Heavy Water

I got the following in an email today. Not exactly a brand new story, but one worth repeating, I thought. And during a time that, for us, has been quite hectic and stressful, this was a nice shake-awake for me…

A lecturer, when explaining stress management to an audience, raised a glass of water and asked, 'How heavy is this glass of water?' Answers called out ranged from 8oz. To 20oz.

The lecturer replied, 'The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it.'

'If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm. If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance.'

'In each case it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.' He continued, 'And that's the way it is with stress management. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy,we won't be able to carry on.'

'As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again. When we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden.'

'So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of work/life down. Don't carry it home. You can pick it up tomorrow. Whatever burdens you're carrying now, let them down for a moment if you can. Relax; pick them up later after you've rested.

Cool story and very relevant to most of our lives. As Christians though, the above paragraph isn’t the last word on burdens.

Jesus said, in Matthew 11:28, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”

As a child of God, you don’t have to rest so you can pick your stress back up again tomorrow. You can lay it down permanently. “Cast your cares upon Him” (I Peter 5:7), because He loves you.

If your glass is getting heavy, then give it to Jesus.